The Roots of Mentorship: How Parental Support Shapes Future Leaders -- Part One
[Part one of a four-part series]
As of this writing in many parts of the world, today is Mother’s Day. We remember our moms for their love, care, and support. Moms have played an important part in nearly all our lives. In this first of a four-part series, we will take a look at the impact mothers (and fathers) have on their children.
No doubt, we have a large list of things that we are most appreciative of our mothers. Some of us have had moms that knew just how to keep us on the straight and narrow. (Some of us needed it more often than others I confess.) She was there when we had success as well as our pain. For some, she is just a memory today. For you, it might not have been mom, but perhaps a grandmother, aunt, or another caring adult.
More, please…
What do you wish your parent (or guardian) had taught you when you were younger? Was it a sport? Cooking your favorite meal? How about personal finance or just how to fix a leaky sink? You might be surprised at some of the answers – and then again you might find that you are not alone.
I recently ran a brief survey among social media users and asked the question what they wish they had learned from their parents. I also sought out other surveys with similar questions. Here are the top five responses:
- Personal Finances
- Self-Worth
- Empathy / Compassion
- Effective Communication
- Handyman/Personal Skills
Money Talk
Digging more into the details of the responses showed that people wished their parents had taught them more about creating and balancing a budget. Investments and retirement were other topics mentioned. Some parents were just not eager to talk about money. In addition, it may or may not be generational. It is quite possible that being transparent might come with embarrassment. Whatever the reason, adults expressed that they wished they had learned more about handling personal finances. When young people learn the value of money early, they are likely to be self-confident and stable in their future finances.
Self-Worth
Respondents mentioned self-worth as something they wished they had learned. The responses seemed to be more than just, “You’re a good kid.” Responses tended towards self-acceptance which is different. Having self-worth speaks to recognizing one’s value. Self-acceptance is more about whether that “value” is acceptable to one's self. For example, someone stated that they had wished they had validation of “who there are” rather than what they can do. In this case, exceptional performance has little value if they feel unacceptable in who they are as a person. Positive self-acceptance in younger people improves self-awareness and confidence to try new adventures and build new skills.
Empathy / Compassion
Along the same line of self-worth is the ability to see worth in our fellow human beings. Respondents mentioned empathy and compassion in the survey. Some of the respondents mentioned that they had wished they had seen their parents demonstrate more empathy or compassion. The spectrum of comments started at wishing to see parents display respect and empathy toward others (including within their immediate family). At the other end of the spectrum were comments like, “I wished I knew they believed in the best in me.” When we teach young people to care about others, they learn to recognize and help when others are in need. They also learn to be happier and are less likely to bully others. Few people will argue that empathy is a tight bond that holds teams together.
What are your thoughts? I would love to read your comments.
In Part Two next week, I will cover a few more of the common themes from the survey responses.
This series is the start of a new project for me regarding mentoring for our future. Our young people need mentors to help them navigate traditional challenges as well as new ones they face today. You might believe the same. If you do, please feel free to drop me an email or message me here.
